Thankful

Today represents not only a national holiday but a turning point in my life. I am officially 40 years old today. I am still thinking about where my life has been, and how quickly the time has gone by. Wow..I really understand what my residents speak of when they talk about how quickly their lives were spent.. On that note; I have taken much of their saged wisdom to heart and am living my life with a purpose and intent instead of simply living. (thank you to my two female elder mentors!) I am so ever thankful for the elders who have crossed into my path on this journey of living.

With that said today represents so very many things to people. Many spend it with family, many spend it at home watching football and resting. Others get out and do things like run a 5K in the snow, (Detroit today has 6 inches of snow on the ground, and it is freezing drizzle/snowing still. Not exactly great running weather!) There are also people who get out and do for others today; working at homeless shelters, handing out meals to shut ins and those in need.

The people I am most thankful for are the employees and care providers who right now across America, are working to take care of our frail, forgotten, and neediest of Americans. Yes they are getting paid to do this..However, on any Holiday they are there working to assure that these individuals are cared for and remembered. In my facility like all across America, a big Thanksgiving meal is being prepared for noon. The dietary staff in any given facility is prepping for that meal as we speak.

I am sure in most buildings, the staff and residents spend this day enjoying the day together. Holidays in a nursing home are chaotic for staff; yet rewarding. Families come into visit in large numbers; many have not been in all year and they will have questions and concerns about how their loved one is. The staff will take the time to respond to every one. Many elders will have a sad day; as their families fail to visit or worse; they have no one to visit and observing the many visitors it reminds them of their all alone in the world status. Again, the staff will recognize this; and offer comfort and empathy; in return the elder will smile, say thank you or give a great hug and both may shed some tears in silent understanding of the emotional connection that occurs.

It is this spontaneous nurturing and giving that occurs that I am so ever thankful for. Outsiders - those who have no inkling of what really happens in care facilities; do not know of the symbiotic relationship that exists between elder and staff. It is a giving/receiving/giving cycle that occurs when true care exists.

As I have focused my life; it is this very element of care that I strive to teach, role model and educate others on. We can create beautiful structures; we can give outstanding clinical care; but without the humanness of giving selflessly; we fail as care givers. It is perhaps the most difficult element to teach, and grasp; it is not visual, nor tangible; it must be felt. Yet, once understood and recognized, it becomes an intrinsic part of the heart and soul of every great caregiver. It is this giving that outsiders "feel" when they come into homes that practice this.

Happy Thanksgiving to each of you. May you recognize the gifts you have given, and those that you receive. Continue to share and allow others to share with you. Be thankful for the simple things..they matter the most in the end..